Movie reviews

Watched the first mission impossible movie today and i have some thoughts

First of all, as a czech guy it was kinda surreal to see and hear czech there and be able to recognize some of the places

Also side note, the czech police guys' voices were weird, idk if its like dubbed over or what but they sounded so weird

Also SPOILER i got to the scene where the guy was on the elevator and they killed him and i was like WHOA i didnt expect them to kill of someone in the first movie, AND THEN THEY JUST KEPT KILLING PEOPLE I WAS LIKE WHAAAAAT

The whole vault situation was... intense.. like i was glued to my seat not making a sound

And also like WHAT IN THE PLOT TWIST???????? I THOUGHT JIM WOULD BE COOL

And OH MY GOD THE SCENE WITH THE HELICOPTER IN THE TUNNEL???? BRO MY HEART WAS R A C I N G LIKE WHAAAAAT


Anyway i enjoyed it a lot and cant wait to watch the rest of them ^^

Alright so i just finished watching the second mission impossible and boy do i have thoughts

SPOILERS

So, first of all, were like what, three minutes into the movie?? and im like alright hes in a plane flying somewhere oh this guy knows him hmm alright.. oh thats weird why arent they fainting.. THATS NOT ETHAN???????? BRO WHEN I TELL YOU I WAS S H O O K E T H I WAS LIKE ????? Like nah in the first movie i think its just ethan whos dressing up as other people but now its like.. OTHER PEOPLE CAN DRESS UP AS HIM???? OKAY

Then it cuts to our boy on vacation and i havent even properly gotten comfy yet and my heart is already RACING, coz like WHERE IS YOUR CLIMBING GEAR???!! LIKE HE WAS JUST DANGLING THERE!!! WITH NO ROPES OR ANYTHING!!!! like ive seen clips of this stunt but BOY

Anyway then was the whole part with Nyah and that was like alright like you two litterary just met but okay whatever

Then the whole part with the CEO or something getting killed?? and then he was fine????? but ethan was there?????? So like was it real or not??????? Idk my brain may just be small but i dont really understand this part lol

Then OH MY GOD THE INFILTRATION OF THE BUILDING AND THE AUSSIE GUY WAS PERFECTLY DESCRIBING THEIR STRATEGY AND I WAS OOOOHHHH ETHANS IN TROUBLE AND THEN HE WAS!!!!!! AND THEN SHE INJECTED THE THING INTO HERSELF AND I WAS LIKE HOLLLY SHIT

And then the whole bunker scene, ethan looked really cool taking down the guys and then it came to the blonde guy and i was like OOOHH NO THIS DOESNT LOOK GOOD and then he saved it AND THEN THE BLOND GUY GOT HIM AND THEN HE BROUGHT HIM IN TO THE ROOM LIKE THAT AND I WAS LIKE NOOO MY BOY AND THEN THE AUSSIE GUY WAS FUCKING SHOOTING HIM AND I WAS LIKE NOOOOOO AND THE ACTUAL ETHAN TOOK OF HIS MASK AND I WAS LIKE WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED BRO MY JAW WAS ON THE FLOOR

And then he saved the day and the girl and im really glad that she didnt die


Excited to watch the third one apparently thats when it gets interesting

So
I just watched mission impossible three

Bro

What in the fuck

My heart was racing basically the entire movie

I'll need like three bussines days to emotionally recover

Like the movie JUST STARTED THE MOVIE HAS JUST STARTED MR CRUISE WE DONT NEED TO BE DOING ALL OF THAT

Also, i really thought the blonde girl would make it but thats on me expecting anyone to live

Also like OH MY GOD LEAVE HIM ALONE HE JUST WANTS TO LIVE LIFE WITH HIS WIFE AND DOGGO

But anyway, THE VATICAN????!!! i was on edge the entire time thinking oooh nooo someones gonna see them

And then the fucking bridge and he jumped over the hole and i almost screamed coz he didnt land like oh my god i thought he was gonna fall

Oh yea and the whole thing where they captured him.... i wanted to jump thru the screen and fucking punch them

And then they were in shanghai.. and the building leap.. AND THEN HE WAS GOING DOWN THE ROOF AND I DEADASS THOUGHT HE WAS GOING DOWN THE SIDE OF THE BUILDING AND I WAS SO FUCKING RELIEVED WHEN HE STOPPED

And then we looped back to the begining and i was nearly crying man I THOUGHT HE KILLED HER

Oh my god and then the whole thing where the thing in his brain started going off.. like i was ON THE EDGE of my seat man i was barely breathing

And then he was okay and i was S O relieved man

Also BENJI HES FINALLY HERE I LOVE HIM ALREADY


Also, sidenote, im sure our short king tried his best but i did NOT understand what he was saying at the airport when he was cosplaying a czech guy lol

Finished watching Ghost protocol

That was really good

Um

SO WHY IN THE HELL WAS ETHAN IN A FUCKING RUSSIAN PRISON?????!!!!!

And then the whole kremlin scene... bro i was holding my breath the entire time they were using the projector thingy in the hallway

And then when the other group got the files first and they blew the whole place up and then ethans escape.. like him on the window i was like please dont fall

And then they were in dubai and i was like yes ill finally see the famous stunt :))))

WHY DID NO ONE TELL ME HE WOULD FUCKING FALL???!!!!!?? WHEN HE WAS TRYING TO CUT THE WINDOW?????? I ALMOST GOT A HEART ATTACK!!! I LEGIT HAD TO PAUSE THE MOVIE SO THAT I COULD CALM DOWN A BIT MR CRUISE DO NOT DO THIS TO ME

Alright and then they had to do the next thing without masks and i sat there nervous as hell

And then the chase through the sandstorm and bro that looked so scary like fr

And then he went back to the guy he helped out of prison and then he came back with an airplane and a really cool car

And then the whole segment in india bro my heart was R A C I N G when they were trying to stop the missile but it was too late and then ethan and the guy in the tall garage or something and they were just throwing the suitcase back and forth AND THEN THE CAR STARTED MOVING AND ETHANS LEG WAS UNDER IT AND WAS LIKE NOOO BUT HE GOT IT OUT AND THEN THE GUY JUMPED AND THEN ETHAN GOT INTO THE CAR AND HE FUCKING DROVE IT OFF THE EDGE AND HE FUCKING SLAMMED INTO THE GROUND but hes okay AND THEN HE WAS TRYING TO DESTROY THE BOMB BUT IT WASNT WORKING AND THEN AT THE LAST SECOND THEY GOT THE ELECTRICITY TO WORK AND IT WORKED AND THEY DESTROYED THE BOMB AND THE RELIEF. THE RELIEF MAN!!!!


Also Jane is so strong. Like damn i want to be strong like that too

AND THE POWER OF FRIENDSHIP

THIS MOVIE WAS LITTERARY THE POWER OF FRIENDSHIP

Aight rogue nation time

That was

SO FUCKING GOOD MAN

OMG THE MUSIC????? THE MUSIC DURING THE OPERA AND HOW IT ELEVATED THE WHOLE SCENE?????? WHEN THEY GOT TO MOROCO??? WHEN THEY REVEAL ITS ETHAN WITH THE PRIME MINISTER?????????? I C O N I C CHEFFS KISS I FELT THIS MOVIE IN MY ORGANS MAN

Now to the story

Okay ive seen the whole scene with ethan on the plane but i didnt know that it was the opening scene, fucking ICONIC THE OTHER DOOR BENJI, I C O N I C

Then we get ethan in the store and i was oh hes getting another mission okay whats it gonna be this time :), uknow, not expecting THAT, and when he couldnt escape the box.. OH M A N

And then we cut to him fucking STRAPED TO A POLE??????? LIKE WHY DID THEY DO THAT AND THEY STARTED BRINGING ALL THESE FUCKING JIGSAW ASS TOOLS AND I WAS LIKE NOOOO MY BOY

And like i recognised Ilsa so i knew he would be okay probably BUT STILL

And then he escaped and then the phone call that they SHUT DOWN THE IMF???? AND HE LOOKED S O LOST MAN LIKE NOOO MY POOR BABY😭😭😭😭

And then they were like searching for him and i really thought that they found him BUT THEY DIDNT

And Benji playing halo 5, iconic

And oh my god. the whole opera thing. like i said. the music. the camera. the action. Might just be my favorite scene in the movie. Oh and nice tux by the way and shoes please. Iconic

And then ethan and benji went into the houseboat and ethan wanted benji to leave coz he was worried for his safety but benji wanted to stay coz he wanted to help ethan and hes his friend😭😭😭😭😭

And then they went to moroco and my god. I need to gush about the entrance again because MY GOD WAS IT EPIC. JUST THE SHOT OF THEM DRIVING THERE AND THEN JUST WALKING EPICLY TO HER LOCATION

And then the whole thing with getting the files. That was so stresfull man i thought that ethan would do it easily BUT THEN THE GUYS FIXED THE COOLING SYSTEM AND HE GOT SWEPT AWAY AND I WAS LIKE OH NO. AND THEN HE WAS STRUGGLING REAL BAD BUT HE DID IT AND THEN HE COULDNT OPEN THE DOOR AND I WAS LIKE O H N O. BUT THEN ILSA APPEARED AND SHE SAVED HIM. SHE SAVED HIM!!!!!!

AND THEN SHE TOOK THE DISK AND THEN THE CHASE. MAN M Y HEART WAS R A C I N G . AND THEN SHE STOOD THERE AND HE RATHER CRASHED HIS BIKE THAN CRASH INTO HER COZ HE DIDNT WANT TO HURT HER AND SHE KNEW THAT

AND THEN BENJI GOT FUCKING KIDDNAPPED????? AND THEY HAD TO GET THE PRIME MINISTER TO UNLOCK THE DISK

I genuinely thought that brandt betrayed them. BUT HE DIDNT IT WAS ALL PART OF THE PLAN BABEY

And then Benji had the bomb on him and i was fucking scared even tho i knew hed be okay

AND THEN THAT CHASE. ETHAN WAS LIMPING AND ILSA WAS HURT AND I WAS LIKE NOOOO

And then ethan jumped into the hole and i was like what are you doing you dont know where that leads to and then lane jumped in too and i was like oh no no no. BUT THAT WAS A PLAN TOO BABEY LANE CAUGHT AND DEFEATED WOOOHOOOOOO


I went into this knowing that its like the fan favorite AND RIGHTFULY SO THIS WAS PEAK

And Lane was genuenly so terrifying. Like i was genuinely scared of him.

Also when the prime minister was like yes i know the cindicate i was like HA suck it UP HUNLEY

10/10 my favorite so far

Alright rewatched top gun its review time

Okay, the opening text with the on March 3rd bla bla and then BOOM its TOP GUN, I C O N I C

And then it cuts to sunrise on the carrier, f14s coming and going and top gun anthem in the background and then its BAM HIIIIGHWAY TOOO THE DANGER ZONE, love it, iconic ten out of ten could watch that for an hour straight

'Whos up there?' 'Maverick and Goose.' 'Great. Maverick and Goose.' lol

'Is this your idea of fun mav?'

'Watch the birdie!'

Amazing

I like that mav comes back for cougar and poor cougar man

The scene where jester is introducing them to the school and half of the pairs have their arms around each other

'This gives me a hard on.' 'Dont tease me.' hollywolf original couple i will forever love you

Icemav starring at each other, Viper immediately liking mav, gooses honking laugh, i love this scene man

Then of course, the bar. So many great things. Mavs heart eyes at ice. 'Well the list is long but distinguished.' 'Yea so is my johnson.' 'Figured it out yet?' AND THE SMILE MAV SENDS GOOSE AFTER THAT INTERACTION. ICE LOOKING AT MAVS LIPS. 'You need to have carnal knowledge of a lady this time'. This movie is so gay

YOU LOST THAT LOVING FEEELING

Sunny and chipper are so drunk lol. AND MAV GOING AFTER CHARLIE INTO THE LADIES ROOM

And then of course the reveal. 'The data on the MiG is inaccurate.' 'Well i just happened to see a-WE' 'Sorry goose, we' i'll forever love you goose hes such a sunshine

'Because i was inverted' 'Bulshit'

'You look great honey.' 'Thanks dear.' DO YOU SEE THIS I LOVE THEM

And then the hop. 'Come on mav do some of that pilot shit' and he did some of that pilot shit. AND THE FLYBY, GREAT BALLS OF FIRE

'You two really are cowboys'

'Thats right! Ice.. man, i am dangerous.'

*chomp*

Just kiss already

'I WANT SOME BUTTS!' love that guy he just wants some butts and to drink his drink in peace

And then goose having the talk with mav and mav taking him completely seriously and promising to be more careful. AND HIM SAYING GOOSE IS THE ONLY FAMILY HES GOT OH MY GOD I WANT TO HUG HIM😭😭😭

'Slider.. you stink'

And then PLAYING, PLAYING WITH THE BOYS dududutudu ILL BE STAYING, PLAAAYING WITH THE BOOOOYS with the booys~ AFTER CHASING SUNSETS, ONE OF LIFES SIMPLE JOOOOYS IS THE BOYS

Also mr jeans and the sweatpants brothers, idk who said it but someone in the tag named them like this and i love it

Oh yea and 'MOTHER GOOSE YOU PUSSY'

Okay can i just say that mav is fucking beautiful during the whole dinner with Charlie. I mean during the whole movie but especially here. Like, those eyes. Like shut up. Anyway

Elevator scene added afterwards to make the movie straighter but did not accomplish that whatsoever. Id actually say it made it even gayer.

CAROLE OH MY GOD I LOVE CAROLE

They way that mav looks at them with just that smile he loves them SO much man😭😭😭 honestly my expression was the same

And then mav is right, like, charlie called him reckless and then almost caused a car crash

And then the shower scene after hop 19 i think it was. Fellas is it gay to puff up my chest and do all that while critisizing my "rival" and fellas is it gay to arch my back like that at my "rival". Also why was slider almost laying in gosses lap on the bench. This movie is so gay i swear

And then. YOU SHAKE MY NERVES AND YOU RATTLE MY BRAIN GOODNESS GRACIOUS GREAT BALLS OF FIRE. Baby Bradley. Also just the fact that Charlie is right there yet mav chooses to sit next to Carole furthest from Charlie AND WITH HIS ARM ON CAROLES SHOULDERS. 'Take me to bed or lose me forever.' 'Show me the way home honey.'

And then nothing happened on hop 31 and goose is completely fine trust i was the water :))))

I just want to hug mav so much man like just the shot of him in the jet after and hes trying so hard not to cry like MY HEART MY BABYYYY😭😭😭😭

And then vipapa invites him home and tells him he flew with his dad and the truth and its just really sweet

And then the graduation and theyre immediately called to action. 'If not i'll fly with you' about the rio thing. BAAAHHAAAAA😭😭😭

And then the mission (heh) and hollywolf are almost immediately hit BUT THEYRE OKAY and then ice has to hold fucking six migs back before mav gets there and then mav shoots down three of them. And just Merlin going 'Youre gonna do WHAT'

And then icemav do a flyby, theyre boyfriends ur honor

'You can be my wingman anytime. 'Bulshit you can be mine.' and then they hug. And then slider shakes mav like a dogtoy

And then mav throws gosses dog tags into the sea and i really like what someone has said in the tag that hes burying him in the sea where he can be close to him

And then icemav fly off into the sunset gayly


THE END

Next on the movie list is Real genius, so lets review it

Going into this i basically just kinda knew what Chris is like and that theres gonna be some kind of a laser

So i was a little surprised to start the movie and the fucking CIA being there???

Then we meet Mitch and hes got embarrasing parents, as one does

AND THEN WE MEET CHRIS and ooooo i like him, were kinda similar

And then Mitch goes to the school and i LOVE the school it looks so fun with all the drawings everywhere and everything

And then Mitch goes into his room and i love the look of it, and then Chris is there and he just wips out all these gadgets and Mitch is like ???

Oh yea and the guy with the long hair that lives in their closet, i was like ??? whats up with him

And then Mitch goes into the lab and mr 'i cant believe someone younger than me is gonna be giving me orders so im gonna be a real prick about it' is there and is a real dickhead to Mitch

And then the scene where they made the ice slide, i LOVED that and we meet the talkative girl and i like her, and i just like how everyone on this school is a little weird

And then its the morning and THE PICKLE DREAM i knew about the pickle dream too, and i love chris' slippers

And then Jerry wants the laser way sooner so Mitch and Chris gotta lock in- well Mitch does and Chris is like and now we chacha~, hes such a fun character i love him

And then Chris changes the angle of one of the mirrors and then uknow invites his friends to this pool party AND IT LOOKS SO FUN I WANNA GO TOO

But of course the blond guy snitches and ruins everything

And then poor Mitch is overworked and calls his parents and is like i dont wanna be here anymore, which was totaly valid and id probably done the same thing, but they started renting his room????? Um, rude???? You didnt even ask him????? And then the blond guy records the phone call and then plays it in front of the whole school and i felt so bad like poor Mitch i wanted to punch the guy

And the conversation with Chris and he tells him that he was just like him uknow studying all the time and everything and not having fun and he was just trying to help Mitch loosen up

And then Mitch goes into their closet once more and this time closes the door and then a door opens and he goes down into the sewers on this like car and the guy with the long hair is there and im like WHOA

And then Jerry kicks Chris out of the school?????? Like excuse you??????

And then its the test and the blonde guy messes up with the lenses in the laser machine and then it explodes and i was like NOOOOO

But because of that Chris is able to solve the problem they were having and complete the laser! suck that blonde guy!!!!

And before i thought that this would be the end of the movie but thats not the case

So they go celebrate and then the long haired guy comes out of his chamber to ask them if they know why Jerry wanted the laser so badly, and then the true purpose of it is revealed and obviously theyre all upset, so they set out a plan to find the laser

And they fucking gass the blonde guy and implant a speaker in his braces?? okayy creative

And then Mitch is like this is Jesus speaking and i lost it lol

But they find out where the laser is and first they a HECKING lot of popcorn kernels in Jerrys house and then they drive to the air force base and they get on the plane with the laser and they like replace a part of the computer with their own and they put their own coordinates of what the laser should hit

And then theyre almost busted AND JERRY FINDS THE COMPONENT ON THE FLOOR but fortunately doesnt have a chance to speak about it

And then they start the laser test AND THEY HIT JERRYS HOUSE AND ALL THE POPCORN JUST COMES POURING OUT OF IT HAH SUCK IT JERRY THATS WHAT YOU DESERVE


This movie was so much fun and i really liked the music in it and val was amazing in this i really liked Chris, probably my fav character from this movie

I couldnt watch anything for like six days and was going a little crazy

BUT I FINALLY HAD TIME TO WATCH SOMETHING TODAY COLLATERAL TIME BABEY LETS GO

So we start the movie with Vincent and like.. okay.. seems a little cold, i wouldnt approach him but if you didnt know anything about this movie youd think he was fine

Then we meet our boy Max, i like Max hes just a sweet guy

And then he picks up Annie and he gives her his photo and i was like aawww and then she gives him her number and again like aaww

I thought that since shes a judge, and i knew something about this movie, that Max and Vincent would get caugth somehow and thats where they would meet again, i was wrong :)))

So then Vincent grabs the taxi and at first everythings fine.... THEN THE GUY FALLS ON THE FUCKING CAR I DID NOT SEE THAT COMING

And Max is obviously like WHAT THE HELL DUDE and Vincent is like he fell:)

And after a while he gets him to drive again and then the cops pull them over and i was like oh no is this it?? but no the cops get called to another place and they drive off

And then the guy.. fanny i think?? was supposed to meet with the now dead guy and starts the investigation

While Vincent fucking HANDCUFFS MAX TO HIS WHEEL WHAT THE FUCK and goes to kill another guy

And Max yells out for help and then someone comes and i really thought they were gonna help him, but no the guy steals Vincents suitcase and then he kills the guys for that and Max is again like ??? WHY DID YOU DO THAT

And then they have some time to kill so Vincent is like ya like jazz? and Max is like no not really, so they go to a jazz club and Vincent asks the owner a jazz question and the owner gets it wrong SO HE FUCKING KILLS HIM????? or maybe he was on the list and i didnt catch it idk

And then they go visit Maxs mom in the hospital and at this point my feelings about Vincent are so conflicted, coz on one hand he kills people for a living but then hes like you should buy your mom flowers

And then Max sees an opportunity and grabs Vincents suitcase and fucking BOLTS

And then hes chasing him and then Max throws the suitcase over the bridge and everything in it breaks

So then Vincent forces Max to go this boss i think and be like sowwy i lost the list can u give me a new one

And Max OBVIOUSLY doesnt want to but goes anyway

BUT NOW THE COPS HAVE FOOTAGE OF MAX SAYING HES VINCENT SO THEY THINK HES THE MURDERER SO THEY GO AFTER HIM but the one guy is like ummmm i think we got it wrong and i was like YES YOU GOT IT WRONG OH MY GOD

So now im scared outta my ass that theyre gonna kill my boy Max

And they go to a club so Vincent can kill another guy, but the cops get there too and im TENSE and then Vincent sees all the cops and he starts taking them down and then our good cop gets to Max and is like i know youre just a driver let me get you out of here and im like YEA GET HIM OUT OF THERE THANK YOU

And then they get outside and Vincent is there AND HE FUCKING SHOOTS THE COP, LIKE, YOU COULDNT WAIT A BIT SO THAT HE COULD TELL HES CHILL???

And Max is PISSED at this point plus Vincent starts yapping about how nothing matters and Max is like ill show you a nothing matters AND FUCKING CRASHES THE CAR

AND THEN WHEN IT SETTLES VINCENT JUST GETS OUT AND LEAVES?????? OKAY LIKE BYE BITCH

And then Max SEES FUCKING ANNIE ON THE LIST AND HES LIKE OH NO AND IM LIKE OH NO SO HE BOLTS AFTER VINCENT

And he gets to her building just in time to call her to warn her BUT VINCENTS ALREADY IN THE BUILDING OH MY GOD AND THEN HE FUCKING CUTS OFF THE ELECTRICITY AND THEN HE GETS TO WHERE SHE IS AND IM FUCKING T E N S E

AND THEN HE FINDS HER BUT MAX GETS THERE AND SHOOT VINCENT AND THEN THEY RUN OFF TO THE METRO BUT VINCENTS FOLLOWING THEM AND HE FUCKING GETS ON THE METRO THEY ARE AT

AND THE TWO ARE HIDING AND THEN THEY ARE AT THE FRONT SO THEY HAVE NOWHERE ELSE TO GO AND VINCENT GETS THERE AND STARTS FUCKING SHOOTING THE DOOR BUT MAX IS THERE AND HE MANAGES TO SHOOT HIM

And then the lights get back on and Vincent is out of bullets and im like oh thank god and then they just sit down and then Vincent dies

And then Max and Annie get out of the metro and leave him there


I really liked the music in this one and the aerial shots of when they were driving and with the city at night and all the lights and the palm trees.. like those scenes were so chill and just vibes all around

Also i can see why people say this is Toms best role, like the whole segment where hes looking for Annie... i shat my pants bro that was terrifying

But overall i enjoyed it a lot, a total tonal shift from all the previous movies lol

Okay Jerry Maguire time!

So we start the movie seeing Jerry in his element

And then hes on that plane and theres the woman and ive seen gifs and stuff so im like oooh its her

And then we get the sweet moment between them and i know theyre gonna get together so im just kicking my feet smilling

And then Jerry is writting the spiel and then he gets to work and everyones clapping for him and at this point im thinking, coz i know this is the breakdown movie, this doesnt seem so bad whens it gonna go bad? and then the guy said well give him about a week and i was like oh

And then the guy fucking fires him because he wanted to get closer to his clients??? and then theyre fighting over the clients over the phones and Jerry manages to get ONE client and its Rod

And then Jerry does the im divorcing you and taking the fish, and hes like who wants to come with me AND DOROTHY COMES WITH HIM

And then he manages to get cush too and it doesnt seem so bad tbh

But then they get with another agent or something and Jerry is left with just Rod

And then he tries to break up with his girlfriend AND SHE FUCKING PUNCHES HIM?????? LIKE MAN I GET YOURE UPSET BUT HUHH???

And then he gets drunk and goes to Dorothys house and he kisses her and shes like ?? what are you doing and he then apologizes

And then he takes her out to dinner and hes like WOW at her dress

And then they get back and he leans in for a kiss but is like no i shouldnt BUT SHE LEANS IN TOO OH MY GOD

Okay side note, the nanny kinda looks a little bit like goose

And then its the morning and Dorothys telling her sister she loves him AND OF COURSE HE HEARS IT

And then they have the chat with Rod and his wife

And then Dorothy was like im gonna take that job in San Diego and i was like NOOOO MAN JERRY LOOKED SO SAD NEXT TO THE VAN

But then he was like will you marry me and i was like YOOOOOOOO

AND THEN THEY GOT MARRIED WOOOOO

And then they were all watching the video from the day and the camera zoomed in on Jerrys face and i was like wait a minute.... coz he looked like.. unsure?? i guess

And then there was the montage of Jerry going around the world with Rod and Dorothy at home without him and i was like WHATS GOING ON

And then Jerry is finally back at home and they have the conversation in the garden.. and MY HEART MAN

And then the day of the big match and im rooting for Rod AND THEN HE SCORES A TOUCHDOWN i think thats the name AND I WAS LIKE WOOOOOO

But then hes NOT MOVING and his wife is calling Jerry and im just praying that hes okay AND HES STILL NOT MOVING THERE ARE TEARS IN MY EYES, AND THEN THEYRE SHOWING THE CLIP OF HIM HITTING THE GROUND AND IM LIKE OH NO IM STARTING TO CRY

AND THEN HE BLINKS OH MY GOD HE FUCKING BLINKS AND IM SO RELIEVED MAN

And then the press is surrounding him but hes like wheres Jerry? and im like BBAAHHAAA HE HAS ALL THIS ATTENTION HES ALWAYS WANTED BUT HE CAN ONLY THINK ABOUT JERRY OH MY GOD AND THEN THEY HUG

And then Rod calls his wife and i think Jerry realizes whats important and he books it out of there TO GO BACK TO HIS WIFE

And then he gets there and hes like our company just had a big night but it wasnt right because you werent there AND IM JUST AAAAAAA

And then shes like you had me at hello and im just AAAAAAA OH MY GOD IM TEARING UP AGAIN


This movie was so nice and cute and everything

Also is there gonna be a Cruise movie thats NOT gonna make me tear up-

Just finished Valkyrie

So i obviously knew how it all ends, we talked about it in school so i knew that the meeting had to be relocated and the reasons why it failed

But anyway

So we start in North Africa and i get to the.. shot.. ehm.. damn thats real okay-

And then the hospital and i was like oh is that his wife? and it was, and okay i knew about the eye but i didnt know about the hand and fingers i wonder how they did that

And then the whole gang gets together and figures out how to get rid of hitler and they come up with the bomb

And then they get into action and the first attempt fails because SOMEONE isnt in the meeting

And then on the second attempt it has to be held in the wooden cottage and we all know how that went

But our man thinks hes dead and so when he gets to Berlin and sees no action because someone didnt order anything hes like WHAT THE FUCK ARE YALL DOING GET INTO ACTION

And they start taking control but obviously the cunt isnt actually dead so hes like WHAT are you doing stop and he orders Stauffenberg and all the other guys to be arrested

So they get arrested and are set to die even tho hitler wanted them alive??? i think at least

So they go one by one and then the lieutenant whos name i forgot goes to stand in front of Stauffenberg when its his turn and tbh it was kinda ??🏳️‍🌈??> And then Stauffenberg gets shot last and we see his goodbye with his wife


Alright even tho i knew what would happen it was still thrilling and i was tense ngl

I dont know how accurate it is since we only went over it briefly but id say at least in the major things it is accurate

Oh yea and i LOVED Toms performance i think he played it great

I just finished watching the last samurai and boy oh boy do i have thoughts

I was SO excited for this movie coz its uknow Japan and stuff and also because i did jiu jitsu for like a year (i wanna be doing it again so bad u dont even know-)

I just wanna say before i start, i am not surprised they dedicated a whole day to him after this

It opens with some saying about the samurai i dont remember oops, and then we see our guy, drunk as hell and he has to give a speech to the people about their last battle against native americans

And then hes presented with the option to go to Japan to train their army to fight against the rebelion and hes like oooo money so he takes it

And then we learn that he wasnt maybe that happy with the murdering of the native americans and hates the guy with the mustashe

So they go to Japan and find out the army cant even shoot right and then the mustashe guy is like well go into battle tomorow and nathan is like are you stupid but i guess hes a higher rank so they go

And then they arrive at the site and go into the forest to battle the samurai and then its like quiet and then you can hear their battle cry and like.. chills man

And then the soldiers dont listen to nathan and just start shooting so the samurai overpower them and they manage to corner nathan and hes fighting like crazy and the leader katsumoto sees this and he reminds him of the tiger so he lets him live and they take him back to their village

And okay just the shot of the leader in full armor with the helmet... holly molly

And so nathan is in the village and after he heals he gets taken to the leader and they have a conversation

And then nathan is slowly learning the ways of the people and hes connecting to them

And i like the scene in the rain when the super good guy i forgot his name challenges him to a fight with the wooden swords and nathan fails every single time but hes still getting up and trying to fight

And then hes starting to learn japanese and the scene where he puts the kimono on and is trying out moves and the kid sees him

And then hes actually training again with the super good guy and two times he fails but then he locks in AND DEFEATS HIM WOOOOO

And then katsumoto and him have a nice long chat about Bushido and what it means to be a samurai

AND THEN THE FUCKING NINJA ATTACK OH MY GOD I WAS NOT EXPECTING THAT

And then the emperor granted them a safe way to Tokyo so that nathan can get back and he obviously doesnt want to go

And just their arrival man.. so cool

AND THEN KATSUMOTO GETS FUCKING ARRESTED and nathan is like not on my watch AND THE WHOLE GANG BAILS HIM OUT BUT THEN THE CHEERFUL GUY DIES OH MY GOD

And then they all go back to the village and prepare to fight the army

And oh my god the fight just... god damn

And they managed to scare the army away but they know they will send reinforcements and they know they can't win against them all but they still go

And then the second wave comes AND NATHAN KILLS THE FUCKASS WITH THE MUSTASHE YESSSS

BUT THEN THE OLD GUY SACRIFICED HIMSELF FOR NATHAN OH MY GOD

And then the generals or some shit bring out the like rotating gun idk how its called and the samurai just start dying bcuz of course its a fucking gun

And then one of the generals can't watch it anymore and he orders to stop

But katsumoto and nathan are still alive and its obvious they lost so katsumoto wants nathan to kill him and he does and then hes like perfect and im crying

And then when the leader dies all of them just take of their hats and get on their knees to show respect and that was so powerful man

And then back in Tokyo the ambassador wants the emperor to sign the treaty but nathan gets there in the middle and gives the emperor katsumotos sword and HE TAKES IT HE MADE HIM LISTEN GUYS

And then the emperor is like fuck your treaty we want to be independent and he keeps the sword as a reminder of where they came from


This was fucking amazing and just so powerful and amazing

AND THE MUSIC!!!!!! OH MY GOD THE MUSIC WAS GODTIER IT WAS SOOOO GOOD

I just watched fucking war of the worlds

Oh my god

Okay

I kinda knew what i was getting into but my god, this is the scariest movie besides actual horror ive watched, if its not classified as horror which i feel like it could be

So the movie starts with the parents giving their kids for Ray to babysit and Robbie is a classic teenager lol

So its all chill for a moment and then.... the storm... and then the lightnings hit the same fucking place 26 times in a row????? I was like wtf????

And then the electricity is out and im like okay happens AND THE PHONES AND WATCHES AND CARS TOO?????? HUH??????

And Ray goes out to investigate and they all gather at the hole and then the ground just starts rumbling and then it spreads and goes thru buildings and the church and it tears the church in half AND THEN THE FUCKING ALIEN MACHINE COMES OUT OF THE GROUND AND THEN IT JUST STARTS SHOOTING PEOPLE BUT NOT WITH NORMAL BULLETS NO WITH SOME FUCKING LASER OR SOME SHIT AND THE PEOPLE TURN INTO DUST IMMEDIATELY

ABD RAY JUST MANAGES TO NOT GET HIT SOMEHOW

And then he gets home and hes fucking covered in ashes....

And the kids are like whats going on and Ray is just like pack ur things we have to get out of here

And they manage to get the only working car and get out of there

So they arrive at the parents house and they arent there theyre in Boston, so they go down into the basement

And then at night the things like break the little windows so they get into the other room AND SUDDENLY THERES FIRE??!!! OH MY GOD

But they make it thru the night and then Ray ventures out and we get some insight into whats going on by the reporter

And then they get into the car and continue to Boston

And then Rachel has to go to the toilet and she goes like next to the river and then the fucking body floats by... and then the river is just full of bodies man, like the fucking chills i got

And then Robbie wants to go fight the things and THATS A TERRIBLE IDEA MAN LEAVE THAT TO THE TRAINED MILITARY

So they continue and they get to the town and there are swarms of people and they see a car and they start FUCKING JUMPING ON THE CAR AND THEY BREAK INTO AND THEY KIDS GET ALMOST SEPARATED but then the guy that had the gun at least let Ray get Rachel

And then they go sit in the diner AND THEM WE HEAR A GUNSHOT FROM THE GUN RAY HAD TO DROP and im fucking sick man like i know that they are all desperate but im still sick from that man

AND THE FUCKING SOB RAY LETS OUT LIKE MY MAN IS JUST TRYING TO HOLD IT TOGETHER FOR HIS KIDS MAN

And so they continue on foot and they get to the ferry AND THEN THE THINGS ATTACK AGAIN LIKE CAN THEY FUCKING CHILL

AND THE FERRY GUY IS LIKE WE GOTTA GO NO MORE PEOPLE AND RAY AND THE KIDS ARE NOT ON THE BOAT YET AND IM FUCKING S C A R E D

BUT THEN THEY GET ON IT SOMEHOW

But they dont get too far BECAUSE THE THINGS CREATE A FUCKING WHIRLPOOL???????? AND THE BOAT GOES ON ITS SIDE AND RAY AND THE KIDS ARE IN THE WATER AND THEN THEY TURN AND THEY ARE RIGHT AT THE FUCKING MOTOR OR SOME SHIT SO THEY GOTTA SWIM AWAY REAL FAST

And they get to shore and then they just continue

And then they get to the hill and the military is there ready to fight the things AND ROBBIE WANTS TO GO WITH THEM AGAIN so Ray leaves Rachel at the tree to go get Robbie and as hes talking some sense to him THESE PEOPLE COME TO RACHEL AND WANT TO TAKE HER AWAY like okay they thought shes alone like they just wanted to help BUT MY GOD

AND SO RAY HAS TO FUCKING CHOOSE AND HE CHOOSES RACHEL AND HE GETS TO HER and im thinking nice now he can go back for Robbie AND THEN THE FUCKING TANKS AND CARS COME ROLLING DOWN THE HILL IN FIRE AND THEN EVERYTHING FUCKING EXPLODES AND IM LIKE NOOOO ROBBIEEEEE

But Ray has to get the hell out of there and then some guy waves at him to come down to his basement and they do

And oh my god when Ray started singing that song i fucking broke down i was c r y i n g

But Rachel falls asleep and the guy and Ray have a chat and the guy is like we have to kill these things and Ray is like idk man seems kinda stupid

And then the things fucking BREAKS THRU THE CEILING AND THEN THE FUCKING TENTACLE WITH THE FUCKING EYEBALL COMES THRU AND THEY HAVE TO HIDE FROM IT i was barely breathing i was so quiet

And they are avoiding it BUT THEN THE GUY STANDS THERE WITH AN AXE AND RAY IS LIKE DONT YOU DARE BLOW OUR COVER and he doesnt hit it THANK GOD

AND THEN THE FUCKING ALIENS THEMSELVES GET THERE AND IM LIKE EEEEW JUST THE WAY THEYRE MOVING

AND THEN ONE OF THEM FUCKING JUMPS ON THE CHAIR RACHEL IS IN AND I JUMP OUT OF MY SEAT THAT SCARED ME SO BAD

But then they fucking leave finally

And then the scene where Ray is looking out the window and it shows the thing FUCKING SUCKING THE BLOOD OUT OF THE POOR HUMAN LIKE OH MY G O D

And then the guy starts going crazy and is being loud so Ray tells Rachel to sing a lullaby to herself and to not listen and he goes to kill the guy coz otherwise he would get them killed

And then they go to sleep and then Rachel wakes up to a sound AND THE FUCKING TENTACLE IS RIGHT THERE!!!!!!! i thought it was her nightmare or something BUT NO IT WAS VERY REAL

AND SHE FUCKING BOLTS IT AND THEN RAY WAKES UP AND HE FUCKING GOES AT THE TENTACLE WITH THE AXE AND MANAGES TO MAKE IT RETREAVE

But then Rachel is nowhere so he goes outside and the fucking red things are there and then he looks over the hill and the whole area is just red... like it looks like a fucking blood ocean

BUT THEN ONE OF THE ALIEN THINGS SHOWS UP AND TAKES RACHEL!!!!!

And Ray finds some grenades and fucking THROWS IT AT THE THING BUT THAT JUST MAKES IT NOTICE HIM AND IT TAKES HIM TOO

And they are both thrown into this fucking basket and all these other people are there

AND THEN THIS FUCKING THING COMES OUT AND FUCKING SUCKS ONE OF THE PEOPLE IN

AND THEN IT COMES OUT AGAIN AND GOES FOR RAY AND THIS TIME THE PEOPLE ARE LIKE LETS TRY TO PULL HIM OUT BUT RAY MANAGES TO GRAB TWO GRENADES AND THEY PULL HIM OUT AND THE GRENADES EXPLODE AND IT KILLS THE THING WOOOOOOOOOOOO

And after that they finally get to Boston and the red things are now white... and then we see one of the big machines slowly withering away.. BUT THEN ANOTHER ONE COMES SO EVERYONE GETS INTO THE TUNNEL but Rachel notices the crows and i guess they are like damaging the thing

And then the soldiers fire at the thing and they manage to bring it down and then the alien just like rolls out of there and dies

And then its over and Ray and Rachel finally get to the house the parents are staying in AND RACHEL IS REUNITED WITH THEM

AND THEN IT TURNS OUT THAT ROBBIE SOMEHOW SURVIVED AND GOT THERE BEFORE THEM OH MY GOD I WAS SO GLAD


What an experience man

Im gonna have nightmares lol

Guys i just watched vanilla sky

Um

What the fuck did i just watch

What is real what the fuck

So we start with the famous time square scene that cost them idk how much and honestly i thought it would be like in the middle or at the end of the movie so i was really surprised

And then we find out its just a dream and David goes out with his buddy Brian before going to work

And then he arrives at work AND HIS GREEN BUCKET HAT I LOVE HIS GREEN BUCKET HAT and then we learn all about him how he got the job and everything

And then hes hosting a birthday party AND WE MEET SOFIA I LOVE SOFIA and Julie is being a little creepy ngl

And then David and Sofia go to her place and spend the whole night together and they draw each other and then in the morning David has to go to work so he goes for his car AND THEN JULIE FUCKING APPEARS OUT OF NOWHERE???? UM.. CREEPY??? but she convinces him to go with her and then she just starts going at him like how she loves him but he sees her as a friend and then she starts speeding up and im like okay i understand youre upset but dont you think that maybe YOU SHOULDNT BE HAVING THIS CONVERSTATION IN A CAR????!!!!

AND THEN SHE DRIVES THEM OFF OF THE FUCKING BRIDGE

And now shes dead and Davids got a broken face and arm and is in a coma but comes out of it

Oh yea and throughout all of this we get these bits of him in prison????? and he killed somebody??? but doesnt remember it???

And it takes him some time to be ready to be seen even in the mask the doctors gave him, oh yea and the doctors, hes like i can barely function my brain isnt working correctly and theyre like okay heres a mask :)))) and im like THATS NOT GONNA HELP HIS BRAIN THO U STUPID FUCKS

And then he goes to this party with Brian and Sofia and hes like grumpy and shit and theyre telling him look we get it but you have to get it together

And then Sofia runs of and Brian goes of too so David goes to another bar table and gets drunk and then finds them again and then they leave and hes still drunk and they argue a bit and Sofia goes first and then Brian and then he runs after them and then just falls to his knees and falls asleep on the sidewalk AND THIS MOMENT IS VERY IMPORTANT BUT I DIDNT KNOW IT AT THAT TIME YET

So then he wakes up to Sofia and shes like i still like you dont worry

And then the doctor was like we can attempt this surgery that will fix your face and hes like yes lets do it

And it was successful and things seem good now

And then the mind fuckery started

So he was sleeping and then he woke up and was thirsty or something so he went to his sink and he turned the light on AND HIS FACE WAS FUCKED UP AGAIN I WAS LIKE HUUUH?????

But then he actually woke up and i was like oh it was just a dream but he went to the sink again and this time his face was fine so he went back to bed AND JULIE WAS THERE???????? WHAT THE FUCK AND THEN SHE WAS LIKE IM SOFIA AND I WAS LIKE ?????????

And then these mind fuckeries just keep on coming and then his psychiatrist was like who Ellie and we were both like ??????? who?????

And then hes in the restaurant and theres this guy and hes like you are god David and hes like yea sure okay i want these people to shut up

AND THEY DO?????? I WAS LIKE WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED

And then he was back with Sofia and they were in bed uknow AND THEN SHE FUCKING TURNED INTO JULIE?????? AND DAVID WAS LIKE WHAT IS HAPPENING AND THEN HE FUCKING SUFFOCATED HER BUT IT WAS ACTUALLY SOFIA AND IM LIKE WHAT THE FUCK

And then were back with the psychiatrist and hes like do you know the guy from the restaurant and Davids like no and then he says thats all the time ive got and then David sees the guy at the tv in relation to the dog and hes like GET BACK IN HERE I KNOW WHO HE IS

So they go together to this organization LE and guys i think who Ellie is now

And they get to this woman and she starts yapping about what the company does and on the pamphlets theres this thing called lucid dreaming or something and David asks about it and then shes like oh its when we freeze you at some point of your life and then youre just dreaming and controlling everything and in like OH, i may have a bit of an idea of whats going on here but also what the fuck

And then she litterary calls him by his name and starts saying some shit and David freaks out and runs of and his psychiatrist runs after him and hes like im real David theyre talking shit but David believes them and so hes like take of the mask and if your face is fucked youre right

So David takes of the mask and his face is fine and im like oh so they were talking shit, AND THEN HE LOOKS INTO THE MIRROR AND HIS FACE IS FUCKED AGAIN????? AND SO DAVID HAS A FUCKING BREAKDOWN AND RUNS OF AND FINDS A GUN AND KILLS THE POLICE GUY THAT WAS SHOOTING AT HIM AND THEN THE PSYCHIATRIST RUNS ONTO THE SCENE BUT THE POLICE GUYS STARTS SHOOTING AND THEY SHOOT BOTH OF THEM AND IM LIKE OH MY GOD

But then theyre fine, like, not a scratch and then the guy from the restaurant appears and takes David to the elevator and theyre going up and he tells David the whole story of how hes actually dreaming right now and we learn that from HIM FALLING ASLEEP ON THE PAVEMENT ITS ALL BEEN A DREAM, MAN WHEN I TELL YOU I WAS FLABBERGASTED, I WAS SHOOKETH MY JAW WAS ON THE FLOOR

And then hes telling what happened in reality about how David could barely function and was misserable but then found the company and everything and Brian did a remembering recemony for him after he got frozen and Sofia came too

And then they get on the roof and the guy is telling him that he can either continue the dream or jump off the roof and wake up

And the psychiatrist gets there and is like DONT DO IT IM REAL DONT YOU SEE and then the guy asks him about the names of his daughters and he cant tell him and then Brian and Sofia are there and David decides he wants to wake up because while the dream Sofia is great shes nothing like the real thing

And so he jumps and then wakes up to a voice of a woman


Ive seen someone describe this as a feel good movie BRO THIS WAS NOT FEEL GOOD THIS WAS FUCKING MIND BLOWING FUCKERY THAT WILL MAKE YOU QUESTION WHATS REAL AND WHATS NOT

That said i enjoyed it a lot lol

SUDDEN REVIEW ALERT

I WAS UNEXPECTEDLY ABLE TO WATCH OBLIVION TODAY

I WONT GO CRAZY WAITING TILL SUNDAY LETS GOOOO

And man am i glad because it was fucking AMAZING

So we start with this memory of Jacks and he gives us a rundown of what happened and what hes doing

So then we see him going out to check on the water thingies and then he finds one of the offline drones and repares it and then he gets a signal from something and that leads him to a sinkhole and he goes down there

And its a library and goes after the signal AND THEN IT TURNS OUT ITS NOT THE DRONE BUT SOME ALIEN MACHINE AND THEN THEY START SHOOTING AT HIM AND THEN THE DRONE HE REPARED COMES BACK AND SAVES HIM

And then he hooks up to the wire and is going up BUT THEN SOMETHING CUTS THE WIRE OR SOMETHING AND HE FUCKING FALLS but is okay and then he finds the book

And then he goes back to the tower and him and Vika have a nice evening BUT SHE THROWS OUT HIS PLANT AND LIKE OKAY I GET IT YOURE WORRIED BUT CMON MAN THATS HIS PLANT

And then he goes to his little place and its this hidden little forest with a lake a hes got a cabin there and everything and there are birds and flowers and its really pretty

AND THEN THE SHIP CRASH and hes like no imma go investigate and he goes there and there are these pods WITH PEOPLE IN THERE and then he gets to this one pod AND ITS THE WOMAN FROM HIS MEMORRIES AND IM LIKE WHAAAAAT

And then the drone gets there and im thinking oh nice its gonna help him get all of these people out, AND THEN IT JUST STARTS SHOOTING THE PODS???!!!! AND JACK STANDS IN FRONT OF THE POD WITH THE GIRL AND SAVES HER AND BRINGS HER BACK TO THE TOWER

And then she wakes up and shes obviously not happy to learn that shes been sleeping for 60 YEARS and everything thats gone down

AND HER NAME IS FUCKING JULIA OH MY GOD MI3 REFERENCE-

And then they get a signal so Jack and Julia go to investigate and its at the same place Jacks memorries are from AND THEN WE LEARN THAT JULIA IS ACTUALLY HIS WIFE?????? HUH??????

AND THEN THEY GET FUCKING KIDDNAPPED BY THE ALIENS

And then Jack wakes up i guess in their lair and then the alien takes off its mask AND ITS A FUCKING HUMAN????? THEYVE BEEN HUMANS THIS WHOLE TIME??????? and then the leader is like we want you to reprogramme this drone so it can blow up the tet and Jack is like what the hell no SO THEY BRING UP JULIA AND THREATEN TO SHOOT HER, WHY DOES THIS KEEP HAPPENING

But they dont shoot her, instead they begin telling him how there actually isnt any titan collony and how its all a lie and the radiation zone is actually perfetly safe and if he goes there he will find out the truth

But they go to the tower and Vika sees them being close and shes not too happy about it and Jack is like cmon let us in but she calls Sally whos begining to sound creepier every second that Jack is no longer suited for the mission and Sally is like aw thats too bad :)) and then Vika finally opens the door and Jack is trying to explain everything to her but she doesnt want to listen AND THEN A FUCKING DRONE APPEARS AND FUCKING KILLS HER????? AND IT WOULDVE KILLED JACK TOO BUT JULIA SHOOTS IT AND THEN THEY ESCAPE

AND THEY GO TO THE ZONE BUT THERE ARE FUCKING DRONES ATTACKING THEM BUT JACK MAVERICKS HIS WAY OUT OF IT AND SHOOTS THEM DOWN BUT THEN THE LAST DRONE FUCKING CRASHES INTO THEM AND THEY CRASH but theres sand so theyre okay and the drone looks like its out and there is just a bunch of smoke coming from behind the dunes and he tells her to stay back and he goes to investigate, and theres another bubbleship and a human and im like looking at the human and im thinking oh they look kinda similar and then Jack gets closer and then the human turns around AND ITS ANOTHER FUCKING JACK?????? um... WHAT IN THE HELL, AND THEN THE DRONE STARTS TO WAKE UP AND THE JACK WANTS TO SHOOT IT BUT THE OTHER JACK DOESNT SO THEY FIGHT AND THEN JULIA GETS THERE AND THEN THE OTHER JACK SHOOT JULIA BUT SHES STILL ALIVE AND JACK MAKES THE OTHER ONE UNCONSSIOUS AND THEN HE GOES TO HIS TOWER TO GET THE MEDKIT AND ANOTHEF FUCKING VIKA IS THERE AND IM LIKE WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON

But he gets the tools and saves Julia and they get out of there and he takes her to his place

And then they go back to the not alien lair and Jack is like alright you were right im reprogramming this drone

And hes done with it and theyre preparing for takeoff WHEN SUDDENLY A BUNCH OF DRONES START FUCKING ATTACKING THEM AND ITS REALLY INTENSE but they defeat them somehow

And then the drone that was supposed to deliver the bomb to the tet is destroyed so they figure that they will put the bomb in one of the pods and sacrifice themselves AND JULIA VOLUNTEERS TO GO 😭😭😭

And so Jack goes with Julia in the pod and on the way there he listens to the recording from the mission Odyssey AND ITS HIS FUCKING VOICE HOW MANY OF YALL ARE THERE WHAT and we see the past ship AND ANOTHER VIKA IS ALSO THERE???? WHAT and then they get hit with something so Jack goes to pull off the part with the pods so they can go get there and then theyre about to enter the tet and then the recording ends and then our Jack is about to enter AND THEN WE SEE INSIDE THOUSANDS OF LIKE INCUBATORS OR SOME SHIT FULL OF JACKS AND VIKAS AND OOOOO BOY THAT SIGHT WAS FUCKING T E R R I F Y I N G

AND THEN WE SEE 'SALLY' AND ITS THIS GIANT FUCKING TRIANGLE ROBOT AND THEN JACK OPENS THE POD WITH THE BOMB AND ITS NOT FUCKING JULIA ITS THE LEADER OF THE HUMANS!!!!!! WHAT THE FUCK

SO THEY BOTH SACRIFICE THEMSELVES AND BLOW THE WHOLE THING UP

And then we see Julia at the lake with a kid and then all the other humans get there AND THE OTHER JACK THE ONE FROM THE DESERT IS THERE AND LIKE ITS STILL HIM OH MY GOOOOOOD


This movie goes straight to the S tier no questions i had SUCK a blast watching this AND THE FUCKING PLOT TWISTS MAN I DID NOT SEE THEM COMING

AND THE MUSIC MAN THE FUCKING MUSIIIIIIIIIIIC IS FUCKING BEAUTIFUUUUUUUL

So somehow i also had time today so i watched cocktail

And honestly it wasnt what i expected it to be, like i expected it to be just a fun movie about bartenders, maybe throw some romance into there but nothing else uknow

So we start the movie with our boy Brian with his buddies in a car with a police siren going after a bus, and i thought that they would fucking rob the bus lol xd

But nah they were just dropping him off so that he can go to new york, also sidenote i thought the baby was his and was confused when he got out of the bus alone

And then he goes to his uncles bar and is like i wanna make a lot of money

So then he just starts going around like banks n shit trying to get a job and theyre all like you have to have a degree and he doesnt have one

And then he stumbles onto this bar looking for new people so hes like eh sure why not and we meet Doug and hes like youre hired, just like that

And then Brian fumbles through the night coz he has no training but hey hes got some moves alright

But hes still like i wanna work in bussiness coz thats where the moneys at and so he enroles at college and starts studying while also working at the bar at night so ofc he starts falling asleep at school and then his teacher doesnt like his work so he quits

And then he and Doug get spotted by some guy and hes like you can work for me ill make you into stars and theyre like sure why not

And then at the new place Brian whips out a poem and impresses this girl and then sleeps with her and the Doug is like i dont like it youre gonna regret it and they make a bet while playing basketball and okay, sidenote, but why is Brian wearing the shortest short in like november or something, like everyone else is wearing like jeans and hes there in fucking booty shorts lol

Also Brian is suggesting they open a bar together

And then Doug steals his girl and hes real mad about it so he flies to jamaica and now works at a bar there and there he meets JORDAN MY GIRL JORDAN and theyre happy together and im like aawww

Amd then Doug gets there and Brian is not happy about that but they make another bet, because Doug managed to get together with a rich girl so now hes like to Brian, bet you cant get that rich girl over there and Brian takes the bet and actually gets the woman and sleeps with her but Jordan sees this and obviously shes not happy about that so she flies back to new york

And Brian realized he made a mistake but its too late now so he goes back to new york with Bonnie and is her driver and shit and then they go to this like art gallery event and hes got enough of this shit so he fucking punches the sculptor and breaks up with Bonnie

And then he goes to Jordan and tries to apologize but she isnt listening which i get, and then she reveals that shes pregnant and Brian is surprised but willing to be there but she doesnt want him to so he leaves

But then he still wants to try and get to her so he finds the place she works at but she r e a l l y tells him no

So then he goes to his uncles place for advice

And then he goes to her parents home, where shes staying now, to try and talk to her and he sees that she is in fact rich but he doesnt care about that

And then he goes to the place Doug now owns and works at to ask him for a job but he drops the bomb at him that hes basically bankrupt now, that he doesnt know anything about finances and spent all that money way too quickly and now has nothing and then passes out coz hes drunk

And then his wife asks Brian to drive her home and to go into her apartment coz she wants to talk about Doug coz shes worried

And so they go into her apartment and then she just starts kissing Brian, like, DIDNT YOU WANT TO TALK ABOUT DOUG, HUH?????? WHERE DID THAT GO and at first Brian kisses her back but then snaps out of it and books it out of there and shes mad at him?????? like sorry he doesnt want to cheat on his not-girlfriend-yet again

And then he goes back to Dougs boat again AND HE FINDS HIM FUCKING DEAD?????????? I WAS LIKE WHAT THE FUCK

And then he got back from the funeral and Doug left him a note😭😭😭😭

And then he runs back to Jordan and explains what happened and that he loves her and he will marry her and she accepts and so they run away together and then get married

And then Brian has a new bar AND ITS GOT THE SAME NAME HE SUGGESTED HIS AND DOUGS BAR COULD BE NAMED😭😭😭 and he whips out a poem ABOUT HIS WIFE and says he wont get spooked again and then she whispers something in his ear and i went are they gonna have twins AND THE BRIAN SAYS THEYRE GONNA HAVE TWINS OH MY GOD IM SO HAPPY FOR THEM


I will admit that i enjoyed this one a tiny bit less than the other ones but that may be because i really thought this would be a fun little eighties movie and then it was just darker than i expected, but i still had a lot of fun watching it and i love Brians shirts, especially those ones he wore in jamaica

Oh yea and the songs slapped, obvi its the eighties lol

Alright magnolia time!

Okay i just wanna say i did NOT expect it to be three hours, like i usually look at how long the movies gonna be but now i forgot

But anyway, bro, did shit go down. It went down up sideways diagonaly it was fucking crazy man

Like, the opening??? they kept listing the murders and then the suicide and i was what the FUCK is going on and then it was just escalating and then BOOM the name of the movie

And then were introduced to our characters one by one and i was surprised to see the guy who played the bad guy in MI3 here i was like the dicaprio meme pointing at him

And then the guy who wants braces lost his job, and Jimmy went to Clara to apologize for fucking her when she didnt really want to???? like okay at least he apologized but like she was so valid for that reaction, and then the cop got a noise complaint to Claras appartment and shes playing music LOUD and is just snorting one line after the other im like I THINK THATS ENOUGH MAN but he still wants to take her on a date and they DO go on a date but then she runs off

And then theres the little kid Stanley and hes playing in this show and he knows a lot of things and then it shows him fucking SURROUNDED with textbooks and im like my god thats really depressing, and then its the day of the show and he REALLY needs to go to the bathroom but no one allows him to so obviously at some point it has to go out and then hes called to a one on one and he doesnt want to go because OBVIOUSLY he doesnt want anyone to know that he pissed himself and then when everyones pressuring him to go he gets angry and just starts spiting straight FACTS how kids are people too and not some toys people can laugh at

And then the braces guy, so he gets fired so he goes to this bar to get wasted and he sees this dude with a lot of cash and since he really needs that money he decides to sweet talk him but just gets more drunk and then he gets out of the bar and gets the bright idea of stealing from his boss and on the way out the key gets stuck in the hole and then he starts to feel bad about the robbery so he goes back but OH REMEMBER the keys in the hole so he decides to climb there thru a window but our cop sees that

And Frank is giving his spiel on how to get bitches and hes like REALLY into it and then this reporter wants to do an interview with him and hes like sure and then she asks about his family and he says that his dad is dead BUT HES NOT DEAD and here i thought that he maybe doesnt know that but no he does and then the reporter is like actually i know that your dad is alive why did you lie to me and he just shuts down and doesnt talk for the rest of the interview, and then he gets a call and its from the nurse saying that his dad is dying and wants to see him to which hes like FINE ill go and then he gets there and is really emotional about it and like, yea that was kinda hard to watch

And his dads wife, Jenny i think?? idk ill call her Jenny, goes out to buy more medicine for him and shes with their lawyer and is like can i change his will i dont want any money, because she initially got with him for the money but then fell in love for real and the lawyer is of course like no and then shes like WELL FUCK YOU THEN and goes to the pharmacy and the guys there are like thinking that all the drugs are for her and then one of them says some real mean comment and she just looses it, rightfully so, and then one of the things was like morphine on steroids or something and if she gave it to him it would like really impact hus recognizing abilities but would help the pain a lot and shes not able to give it to him bit she leaves the bottle on the table and then when shes not there the nurse gives it to him, and she goes to her car and takes one of his pills to kill herself i guess but then the little rapping kid finds her and calls and ambulance, after stealing her money

And then

THE FUCKING FROGS START FALLING FROM THE SKY ITS LIKE A HAIL STORM BUT WITH FROGS AND I WAS LIKE WHAT IN THE FUCK IS GOING ON and then were in Claras appartment and it zooms in on this quote but it did happen so i think its some english saying or something idk

And the braces guy gets hit in the head with a frog and falls on the ground AND BREAKS HIS MOUTH and the cop sees this and he drags him under a roof and then when the frogs stop he takes him to his boss place so he can give back the money

And then the ambulance with Jenny gets TURNED ON ITS SIDE but then shes in the hospital and shes okay

And then it ends with Clara smiling


What a fucking movie man i feel like i havent blinked for three hours, and thats a compliment

AND THE MUSIC OH MY GOD it starts like cressending from some point until like the half mark and its REALLY intense and just makes you GLUED to it

Also i hope at least someone got an oscar for it because my GOD IS THE ACTING FROM EVERYONE JUST AMAZING LIKE OH MY GOD

Okay so i just watched edge of tomorrow

And i knew that it would end good so it was kind of a mission situation where i was like how the hell are they gonna do this

So we get the situation served and its THE MIMIC- these aliens are attacking Earth and now theres a super new weapon that can destroy these things, and honestly with the way it was introduced i was kinda getting the vibe that it would be some kind of a totalitarisn thing but it wasnt

And then our guy Cage is in london and hes talking to the general there and hes basically like yea the weapon is great youre gonna be at the frontlines tomorrow and Cage is like hahaha waitwhat-

And then he wakes up at the camp and is trying to explain that he shouldnt be there but no ones buying it

So then he gets geard up and then when theyre flying to battle their plane gets FUCKING BLOWN UP and Cage somehow survives and then he finally figures out how to activate the guns and then starts shooting everything and then he kills this big mimic and then he gets like infected with it or something

And then he wakes up at the camp again and is like what the FUCK is happening and then theyre up in the air again and they crash again and this time he sees Rita and she dies and then he dies too

And then the next time he saves Rita and she tells him to come to her when he wakes up

And he tries to do that but gets run over by a car and it was funny ngl

But then he manages to get to her and she takes him to this room where she and this technician guy explain to him whats going on, andimtryingtonotthinkaboutabothewholetime-

Basically theres this omega which can control time and he killed an alpha and its blood got into his blood and the alphas are like connected to the omega so now hes doing these resets and hes gonna get visions of the omega and then they will have to go there and kill it so they can win the war

BUT FIRST, training montage, where Rita tells him that if hes injured he has to kill himself otherwise hes gonna get a blood transplant and hes gonna lose the ability to reset the day

And then he gets the vision and the omega is somewhere in germany

So first they have to get out of the beach and that is a HASTLE but they manage it and then they get the car but they run out of gas so they find the house where there could be gas and in the backyard theres a helicopter and Rita is like nice we can fly and Cage is like i can't fly helicopters and then Rita tries to like unhook it but her shoulder is injured so Cage bandages it and then makes her coffee and he knows how she likes it, so this isnt their first time here and he knows where everything is and has been stalling for time, and then he reveals that he couldnt find a way to get both of them out of there but Rita still goes into the helicopter and turns it on and then a mimic comes out and kills her

And then when Cage wakes up, he doesnt talk to her and goes to germany alone

And he gets there AND THE OMEGA ISNT THERE IT WAS A TRAP

So he tells Rita and the guy and the guy says that he almost developed a way to like link an alpha and a human od something, but when he tried to tell the general he didnt believe him and he lost his job, but that prototype is still in the generals safe, so Rita and Cage go there, and again Cage knows whats gonna happen so its not their first time there, and they get to the general and this time he gives them the prototype

And then they go outside AND EVERYONES JUST POINTING THEIR GUNS AT THEM SO THEY MAKE A RUN FOR IT AND THEY GET IN A CAR AND THEN CAGE SHOOTS THE SERUM IN HIS LEG and now he can see where the omega actually is and its in the fucking louvre

BUT THEN THEY GET CAPTURED AND THEN CAGE WAKES UP IN A FUCKING HOSPITAL AND HES GETTING A BLOOD TRANSPLANT AND HE LOST THE FUCKING POWER SO ITS ALL FOR REALZIES THIS TIME

So they have about three hours to kill the omega before the invasion starts but they need some soldiers and Cage remembers his squadrom back at the camp, and he tells them everything and they dont believe him really but then Rita shows up and theyre like oh hell yea well go

So theyre in Paris and are about to land peacefully WHEN THEIR SHIP IS CRASHED INTO AND THEY GO DOWN AND HALF THEIR TEAM IS DEAD BY NOW AND THE SHIP CRASHES INTO A BODY OF WATER AND CAGE IS THERE AND I THOUGHT HE WAS DEAD BUT NO HES ALIVE

And then he meets up with Rita and the surviving guys and theyre like how the hell do we get there Cage is like we can slide there in that plane

So they do that BUT THAT GRABS THE ATTENTION OF ALL THE MIMICS THERE BUT CAGE AND RITA GET TO THE LOUVRE

And theres a fucking alpha and Cage volunteers to be bait but Rita insists that she be bait and he reluctantly agrees

And then they kith~

So Cage goes down into the water with the grenades and Rita manages to hold the alpha off but is then killed and all the mimics follow Cage into the water AND THEY GET HIM BUT HE MANAGES TO ACTIVATE ALL THE GRENADES AND THEY GET TO THE OMEGA AND IT BLOWS UP AND THAT DEACTIVATED ALL THE FUCKERS

AND THEN THE LIKE FLUIDS OR SOMETHING FROM THE OMEGA INFECT CAGE AND HE HAS THE POWER AGAIN AND THEN HE WAKES UP

And he wakes up in the helicopter in london in his officer uniform and the speech from the general confirms that they fucking did it, and then he goes to the camp to Rita and shes like you want something and he just smiles with happy tears and then it ends


Although i had some.. distractions... during this movie (CAN EVERYONE NOT CALL ME WHEN IM WATCHING A FUCKING MOVIE WHY DOES THIS ALWAYS HAPPEN-) i enjoyed it a lot and it definitely deserves all the hype it gets

So i watched the firm yesterday

First of all i'll say it was kinda hard to pay attention to the movie because SOMEONE was very distracting

ANYWAY-

So Mitch is looking for a job and then these people are like ooh we chose you specificaly and he gets a job at the.. firm

And like it seems good he and his wifey get a house and a new car and everything

And then they go to the barbecue and Abby is like meeting the other wives and theyre like you know the firm doesnt discourage having a job bcuz shes a teacher and like wants to work and then they say other things and im like HOLD THE FUCK UP. THIS DOESNT SOUND VERY GOOD. THIS SOUNDS VERY CONTROLING ACTUALLY

And then the two guys die mysteriously and then Mitch goes with Alvry or whats his name to the islands and he talks to the ship guy and hes like yea their bodies werent found and Mitch is like oh shit whats going on here and starts a little investigation

And when hes on the island he sees this woman getting harrased by this man and he stares at them coz hes drunk and then the dude notices him and runs away and then Mitch goes to help the girl and fixes her ankle and then she like leans in for a kiss and first hes like hesitating BUT THEN FUCKING GOES FOR IT AND IM LIKE NOOOOOO YOURE MARRIED MY GUY DONT DO THAT but he did it and regrets it

And then he goes to visit his brother in prison and he gives him a tip on this private investigator who could look into it

So he goes to him and hes basically like not my cup of tea but fine i'll do it

AND THEN AFTERWARDS THESE TWO DUDES COME IN AND ARE LIKE you were asking questions about the dead lawyers why AND THEN ONE OF THEM FUCKING KILLS HIM

And then Mitch gets contacted by the FBI and they tell him theyre on the case and that he either works with them and gets them some documents or he goes to jail

And at first hes like hell no the fuck im not a snitch and even tells his coworkers about it AND THEN THE FBI PULL OUT A MANIPULATION OF THEIR OWN AND SHOW HIM A PHOTO OF HIM AND THE GIRL AT THE BEACH

And then hes like alright if you get my brother out of jail and give me money i'll do it and the FBI REALLY doesnt want to do it but then they give him half of the money and release his brother and he and the dead investigators secretary Tammy just start COPYING the SHIT out of these documents

And then his brother Ray i think is free but the FBI wants to put him back in jail bcus of course BUT HE ESCAPES THEM HAHA SUCK THAT LOOSERS

And then Mitch graduates and he and Abby go on a nice dinner and he tells her that he cheated on her bcus he doesnt want her to hear it from the FBI and shes obviously upset and wants to leave and the cover up story is that her mom is i'll and she wants to see her

And then when its Abbys last day at school the Alvry Guy shows up and hes going back to the islands and invites her but she declines but then he says something with scuba diving that contradicts what Mitch told her and she goes OH SHIT HES GONNA DO SOMETHING BAD MAYBE and she decides to go after him

And then at the location she puts something in his drink and he falls asleep deeply AND THEN SHE GOES FOR THE DOCUMENTS THAT ARE IN THE HOUSE AND SHES BRINGING THEM OVER TO TAMMY WHOS ALSO THERE AND THEY START COPYING THE SHIT OUT OF THEM

Meanwhile Mitch is getting fucking CHASED BY THE GUYS WHO KILLED THE INVESTIGATOR AND HES AVOIDING THEM AND THEN HE GOES TO THIS HOUSE AND TO THIS BASEMENT AND TRIES TO GO OUT THE WINDOW BUT WHEN HE FINALLY BREAKS THE GLASS THE BLONDE GUY IS TOO CLOSE SO HE FUCKING HUMAN FLAGS ON A POLE NEAR THE CEILING

AND THE BLONDE GUY DOESNT NOTICE HIM BUT HE PICKS UP HIS SUITCASE AND THEN THE OLDER GUY SEES HIS REFLECTION AND SHOOTS HIM THINKING HES MITCH AND THEN MITCH BEATS THE SHIT OUT OF HIM AND ESCAPES

And then he goes to one of their clients and is looking like a wet cat and asks them for a signature on this list so they can get their money back

And back at the islands the girls have copied everything and then Alvry wakes up and he knows theyre gonna kill him and they do

And then Ray gets there and he goes away with Tammy and the money from FBI and Abby goes back home

And Mitch also goes back home and he meets the FBI guy and is like suck my ass it was all legal you dont have anything on me and the guy stomps away angrily

And then Abby gets there and shes willing to try again and then they go back to Boston cause their house is in SHAMBLES


Damn this was a fucking RIDE

Also i didnt mention it before but when Mitch gets back home from another long night and Abby says you could at least get me flowers sometime AND THEN HE PULLS OUT THE ROSE AND THEN HE JUST SLOWLY KISSES HER HAND. LIKE IM ACE BUT I FELT SOMETHING. I FELT SOMETHING. JESUS.

And as i said it was hard to pay attention to this, like, the hair, the eyebags, the red under his eyes-

Like he looks fucking good in this okay they shouldve made him look like he hasnt slept in a week more often

Anyway thoroughly enjoyed this one

MOVIE REVIEW TIME!!!

This time its the second fnaf movie

We got to see it a ady earlier than america, which i was very surprised about, because last time we had to wait a whole ass week to see so i was dodging spoilers left and right lol

BUT NOT THIS TIME

I went with my friend and we both dressed in purple and i brought my springtrap plushie just like last time, and there were a lot of people in full ass cosplays it was amazing

Man boy oh boy THE FUCKING OPENING SCENE, THE WHOLE THING WAS JUST SO COOOOL IT MAY BE THE BEST THING IN THE WHOLE MOVIE

Just fucking Charlie sitting there, waiting for the puppet, and then the boy being lured by Afton and her noticing and then none of the adults helping so she went there alone??? and man they were right when they said they upped the scariness coz when she like turned and Afton wasnt there and then she picked the boy up and then she was just running down the hallway and Afton behind her just getting closer and closer like BRO i had CHILLS and then she got out and saved the boy and then screamed and then it showed the stab wounds???? and then she fell down the trap door and then the puppet emerging with her in their arms with the music?????????? ABSOLUTE CINEMA

And then the opening amazing as usual

And then Abby teasing Mike about him and Vanessa, that was funny

And then the crew from the tv show going to the pizzeria to like film it and the guy panning the camera and then BOOM MICHAEL JUMPSCARE i actually jumped from my seat lol

Also, when he said call me Michael i clocked him immediately i called him being an Afton

And then the crew got to the pizzeria and the animatronics came to life and started killing them, honestly i thought that the kills in the first movie were better, like, i liked the kill in the water, but like, he had enough time to just get out of there uknow, like they probably wanted to utilize the water but i was just screaming at him to get out, but the mini puppets are cool, they remind me of minireenas

And the girl getting possessed by Charlie, the puppet coming out of the box was cool and again i jumped from my seat, but i still dont know how i feel about Charlie being evil and possessing other people

And then Mike and Abby went to the original location coz Abby wanted to see her friends, and thats where they find the faztalker, but Mike picks up the Freddy plushie and it makes the hor hor hor sound and we all went ballistic at that lol that was so funny

And then the faztalker guides Abby to the second location to the toys

And then the science fair, all my homies hate the teacher the teacher can suck my dick

AND HE FUCKING DESTROYED ABBYS CREATION!!!! LIKE WHAT THE HELL DUDE HE WAS LIKE ooooh nooo i dropped it :))))) FUCK OFF

And then Abby brings toy Chica to the fair and the guy is rude to her so shes like i wannna know whats inside his head :) and i was like oooh is she gonna like slice his head in half, but no, she just crushed his head and then was like yup, nothing at all :))

And then Vanessa tries the dream method and shes all like im not scared of you anymore to her dad even tho she clearly is, AND THEN WE SEE CIRCUS FUCKING BABY????????? OH MY GOD?????? I COULD NOT SEE THAT FROM A MILE AWAY HOLLY SHIT I THINK THE FUCKING FUNTIMES ARE GONNA BE IN THE THIRD MOVIE GUYS HOLLY SHIT AAAAAAAAAAA

And then like Abby goes back to fix the toys and Vanessa also goes back to talk to Charlie, and then Charlie forces Vanessa to give the password to send the toys free so they can go out and kill people

So now Mike and Vanessa have to stop them and Vanessa goes out to find them and Mike stays AND THEN THE WITHEREDS COME TO LIFE bro that was fucking TERRIFYING WHEN THE CAMERA WAS LIKE ON WITHERED CHICA AND SHE WAS COMING TO LIFE I WAS LIKE OOOOOH THATS SCARY, AND THEY LOK SO GOOOD MAN

And then when Freddy came into the office IT WAS JUST LIKE IN THE GAME HE WAS IN THE EXACT POSITION, AND THE MASK NOT WORKING ON FOXY

I just wish they got a bit more screen time i feel like they didnt use them as much as they couldve

AND MANGLE LOOKS SO COOL OH MY GOD

And then Mike goes to the original location to ask the ogs for help with the toys, and like the faint singing was really cool i got chills

AND THEN THEY ALL GATHERED AT MIKES HOUSE AND THEN MICHAEL IS THERE!!!!!!!! AND HE REVEALS THAT HES VANESSAS BROTHER

AND THEN THE TOYS STARTED TO COME AT THEM BUT THEN THE OGS SHOWED UP AND FUCKING OBLITERATED THEM AAAAAAAAAA IT WAS LITERALLY LIKE THE OLD ANIMATION OF THE OGS VS THE TOYS

And then they all started to just malfunction and then the golden freddy spirit showed up and explained that their time is up, which i dont know if i believe, and that he cant hold him anymore and hes gonna come back and Mike was like ???

And then Mike fucking left Vanessa, which i kinda understand, AND THEN SHE GETS POSSESSED BY CHARLIE AND BOOM ROLL THE CREDITS

AND OF COURSE THEY PLAYED ITS BEEN SO LONG OF COURSE THEY DID

AND THE MID CREDITS SCENE????????? HELLO????? THEY FOUND A REAL ONE!!!!!!!!! I THOUGHT THEY WONT SHOW HIM AS A CLIFFHANGER BUT THEY DID!!!!!!! under a plastic bag BUT THEY DID AND OH MY GOD HE LOOKS SO GOOOOOD IM SO EXCITED

AND THEN FUCKING HENRYS MESSAGE??????? THAT LITERALLY SOUNDED LIKE IN THE GAME HOLLY SHIT

Also side note, almost everyone left before they could hear the message there was like five of us there lol


Broooooo but i genuinely liked this one, i think its a big improvement from the first one and im so fucking excited for the third movie

Also our theater was fairly quiet idk why, also i saw it after having to wake up for an 8 am class and i was so fucking tired at the end lol